04.13.17 Dharma Talk : Blaze
Do you know that Marion Williamson Quote about “…we don’t fear that we are inadequate but we are powerful beyond measure”? Well, it’s true.
It can be hard to remember that the space that we take up in the world doesn’t necessarily belong to someone else. Shining our light as bright as possible doesn’t diminish anyone. It is uplifting and illuminating those around us.
For me, I could not tell for many many years that my mind or thoughts were worth sharing. Being sure about one’s self was not really a thing that girls and women did in my family.
Growing up I was a fat kid - not an athlete. I began to believe that pretty quickly. I never identified as someone with substantial physical ability. I placed no value in my body. I tried to be a singer. It seemed like something that a girl with a fat body and a pretty face could do.
That didn’t work.
When I was in my 20s I learned to swim. I have never been fast, but I learned to swim really well for hours at a time. I still didn’t feel like an athlete if my body didn’t look athletic.
I learned yoga, I loved it, it felt good. I never felt like it was good enough because i didn’t look like a yogi.
Weirdly, the place where I really found myself standing the most confidently in my body was at a cross-fit style gym when I learned how to lift. My body was so strong and muscular and sturdy and capable that I couldn’t turn away from from its power. I could never again not see myself as an athlete.
I mentioned earlier today while promoting the class on social media. That we only have one job and it is to blaze. And we don’t have to leave our bodies behind to do this. We get to construct and tend to our inner fire and make it as powerful and hot and lustrous as we can manage.
In yoga one of the things we do with our bodies and minds is practice building capacity for tending to that fire. Allowing it to fuel us but not devour us.